In a bizarre instance of "have your cake and eat it too" — where "cake" is replaced with "Cobb" and "eat it" is replaced with "Atlanta" — state Sen. Horacena Tate (D-Atlanta) has proposed a bill that would allow Atlanta to annex the 60-acre SunTrust Park site. The proposal would keep the Braves in Atlanta following their 2017 move across the Chattahoochee River into Cobb County by moving Atlanta to them, which is a rather ingenious scheme. The bill leans on Census tracts to somehow legitimize the move. But, as expected, a few lame-o naysayers are calling "foul." A major point of contention might stem from the way Cobb taxpayers are footing the bill for the stadium, and how they probably wouldn't be all too pleased seeing Atlanta swoop in and cash out when the stadium opens. Also, it might be unconstitutional, according to Rep. John Carson (R-Marietta — biased much?), though when has the Georgia Constitution ever stopped politicians from doing crazy things?
While the entire premise may not be legal, and few outside of Atlanta are likely to support the city randomly taking over swaths of other people's land, it seems only fair to attempt to validate the proposal.
· First, it has recently come to light that the Braves are going to try to steal away a statue that the people of Atlanta bought to commemorate Hank Aaron. It seems that the logical solution is to let them take it… and then steal the ground out from underneath it.
· Secondly, the folks in this area of Cobb already use "Atlanta" as their mailing address. Considering it is illegal to open misdirected mail, by opening mail addressed to Atlanta, they're already in a state of de facto acceptance regarding where they really, truly are. The bill would validate something that already seems a pretty clear fact.
· Far and away, the hardest hitting fact is that the Atlanta Braves intend to keep their name, and it's only right that they play within their eponymous hometown. Not in the pseudo, Cobby fringes of Atlanta, but in the damn city.
Let's do this. Right?